Kim Kardashian West may be trying to lose weight, but she “looks amazing now,” a source tells PEOPLE The fashion and beauty mogul and reality star, 39, said Saturday night that she wants to get to “a really good goal weight” after gaining around “18 lbs ” over the last year. Despite what the mom of four may think, “she looks very healthy,” the source says “Kim loved being that skinny because people kept commenting about her weight. It just required her to be on a super disciplined schedule with workouts and food ” And that strict diet and exercise plan was not possible with all of her life changes over the last few months, which include welcoming son Psalm in May and launching her shapewear line Skims “She gained weight this year, because she has been too busy to keep up with that insane schedule,” the insider says Image zoom But Kardashian West “wants to be open about her weight gain,” the source says, and that started with her Instagram posts on Saturday “She wants people to know that even though she has nannies, a trainer and chef, it still takes a lot of work for her to stay in shape,” they said “Even for Kim, it’s hard to stick to a constant schedule.” Kardashian West said that it was her diet, in particular, that changed over the last year “Sometimes we fall off and sometimes you really gotta get it together, and this is one of my fallen-off times,” she said while working out with her trainer, Melissa Alcantara “To feel good, I just want to get it like, a really good goal weight, and so that means working out at all costs It’s my eating. I work out but it’s, like, my eating.” Still, husband Kanye West is a fan of how she looks now “Kanye loves her the way she is,” the source says. “He doesn’t like when she basically kills herself to be skinnier ” But for Kardashian West, she has a plan in mind for her milestone birthday next year “I have a major goal for by the time I’m 40,” she said on Saturday. And the next morning, she was back in the gym “A morning workout after a night workout is the best!!!” she posted.